Wendy's Adventures In Actually Getting A Mate (Aka Getting Laid)
by scribbles and such
Summary: Because she somehow managed to gather all the dragon slayers for a girl talk, screw somebody around ten years older than her and scare Romeo half to death in under twenty-four hours.


**Ship(s): **Mest ❁ Wendy

_**A/n: **__So, right now I have like five MesDy one-shots in the making and am having a difficult time finding a way to continue them, as well as my other chapter stories that I have writers block for. So I decided to write this to try and get out of my funk._

**X-X-X-X-X-X-X**

Today was the day that most dragon slayers hated; Wendy was no exception to this. For a while she didn't have to worry until she got back from Tenrou Island and realized that Romeo was going to be the same age as her, well, the same age _body wise_. She was technically nineteen if you counted the seven years she was "dead". Though she quickly found out that Romeo was going to be no problem whatsoever because he wasn't the one for her.

That's right, today was the infamous '_Creation Day'_. Basically, it was called that because today was a day where dragons found their mate and later that night did adult "things" and children were "created", hence the title '_Creation Day'_. Natsu had already found his mate; Lucy, and he was perfectly fine now. Gajeel on the other hand spent the whole day hiding away so his "crush" on Levy wouldn't be revealed and so he wouldn't try to screw her senseless in broad daylight. There were children in this guild for Pete sake, and she was counted as one of them! So yes, in one sentence, dragons basically had a day of horniness.

Wendy was 16 now not including the seven years, and that's when he dragon hormones started kicking in; saying Wendy was miserable was an understatement, she felt as if she would explode at any given moment. Sure, the girls at the guild were helpful and experienced with normal_ human_ puberty, but not _dragon_ puberty, oh lord, they had no idea.

Lucky for the sky-maiden, she had actually _forgotten_ that today was _that _day and just decided to go to the guild. Biggest mistake _ever. _Turns out that the magic council had decided to pay one of their—now regular—check-ups on Fairy Tail to make sure they weren't doing anything illegal inside their supposedly 'notorious' guild. And at that moment, _everything _changed. A far too familiar scent reached her nose and it was driving her crazy. This was painful, extremely painful. She was too young for this, the entire guild still considered her a little kid, even though they had Asuka who was nine now.

Wendy knew exactly who this person she smelled was, and she didn't like herself for it. He was like ten years older than her for crying out loud! This wasn't okay. And at the moment her insides felt like mush; her knees jelly.

"Fucking dragon hormones" She muttered under her breath, obviously pissed at what was going on at the moment. There was a broom closet—which she would make sure to take Max's beloved out of—before fucking Mest's brains out. Yup, dragon's had a day of horniness for sure.

**X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X**

She thought it was supposed to be for one day not forever, but nope, nada, zilch, this was going to last until she _actually _did something with him. Wendy then thought about how Natsu must have felt after finding out Lucy was his mate and waiting _that _long to claim her as his. They were partners for over a decade, which scared Wendy shitless. She was _not _going to deal with feeling like this for a decade. The young woman hoisted herself off of her bed, which was located in her apartment in Fairy Hills and threw some clothing on; she needed to have a talk with the _others. _

**X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X**

"Wendy, it's three o'clock in the morning, the fuck d'ya need," The heavily pierced, iron dragon slayer groaned. Wendy was basically his little sister, as well as Natsu's and they both would do anything for her. And when he said anything, he meant _anything_ and _everything_.

"As much as I hate to admit this, Gajeel's right Wendy, why did you call us, _and _those SaberTooth idiots?" The salmon-haired salamander grunted sounding a bit aggravated.

"More importantly, how did you get a _criminal_ out of the magic council's _jail._" The second-generation, lightning dragon-slayer emphasized. Cobra just shrugged and mouthed a 'so what'.

Yes, Wendy had managed to gather up _all_ the dragon slayers in existence—besides Acnologia who would surely kill them all—for her 'little' problem. Though there was one problem with all of them; not a single one was female.

The sky maiden squirmed a little where she was seated; currently, they were all on the floor in the Fairy Tail guild's very unknown lounge. Her back was leaned up against an old, dusty couch that looked as if it would break if anybody were to sit on it.

"Oh, I know _exactly_ what this is about" Rogue spoke calmly, while Wendy let out a high pitched squeak and gave a blush that would put _Jellal's blushing_ to shame. "That's what I thought. My thoughts appear to be correct"

"Well, are you going to tell us?" Laxus asked impatiently, he wasn't a morning person. He also wasn't a _getting-woken-at-three-in-the-morning-for-girl-problems _kind of person.

"Wendy, I swear to Mavis, if you're pregnant—" Natsu was saying before Gajeel interrupted him "Dipshit! She isn't pregnant; dragons only mate once smartass, unless she was involved in some sort of scandal—Wendy! Master told all the girls in the guild to be on birth control for this exact reason!" The blue-haired female now looked like a tomato with hair.

"I'm not pregnant" She squeaked, obviously humiliated about what was going on. Both Natsu and Gajeel's mouths made an "o" shape.

"The little brat found her mate, didn't she?" The lightning-dragon slayer said aloud like it was nothing. She squeaked again; this was the most humiliating thing that had _ever _happened to her, in her _entire life_.

"Holy shit she did" The iron-man gawked.

"It's that Romeo kid, right" The smaller of the two blonde dragon slayers asked.

"No, it couldn't be Romeo, if it was they'd be doing the dirty at the moment if it was. The kid has a crush on her. It's blatantly obvious. It's somebody older, or somebody who nobody would approve of; including herself." Cobra spoke aloud, finally saying _something _and contributing to the conversation. All the slayers were now staring in disbelief at Cobra, besides Wendy; she was hiding her face in a pillow.

"Well you're one to talk" Sting announced—more like stuttered-, still in shock that the poison dragon slayer knew how to speak. The wind dragon slayer was still squirming in her spot on the ground. This was humiliating, he was so much older, and so, so attract—

"You guys are humiliating! How come you couldn't be a little more considerate, can you not see that she's squirming around in embarrassment?" Rogue spoke, and thank Mavis for that. Her thoughts were going somewhere she did _not_ want them. Rogue understood her. He knew the feels she was feeling. That settles it; Rogue is the other girl dragon slayer. Yes.

"Wendy, the fuck were you doing outside Fairy Hills on Creation Day anyway, we've told you before not to go outside on that exact day, its dan—"

"Well I forgot! It wasn't a problem before, and now it is!"

"Let's think, who was in the guild that day who usually isn't" Gajeel spoke, not getting interrupted again.

"Well didn't that Gildarts guy come back—Wendy, please tell me isn't Gildarts, he has a daughter and she's older than—"

"No! Ewe! That's disgusting!"

"Well we know he isn't over thirty years older than her," Laxus stated with relief.

"Hey, wasn't the council here giving one of their check-ups so they knew we weren't running some illegal drug business of something!" Natsu declared loudly. The sky maiden squeaked yet another time.

"Is it that Lahar shit? He tried to kill us all Wendy!" 

"No! It's—It's not him—Either way he's dead"

"Hey! One of the trimens was in the council, Eve! Is it him? He's not that old either, sure he's 23, but at least he's not in his thirty's" Sting said optimistically, he wasn't that bad of a person once you go to know him personally; Sting was basically another Natsu, which was both good, and bad.

"No, he's not even in the council anymore, he's just an annoying womanizer!"

"It's Doranbolt, he's the only one left" And that's when Wendy let out possibly the most high-pitched screech known to mankind.

"Your mate is _him!_" About every single one of the dragon slayers shouted, with the exception of Cobra who already knew and Rogue whom apparently _'doesn't scream'._ Okay, this was embarrassing, but was even worse was that a _far_ too familiar scent had just reached her nose.

"Hey, I smell somebody, do any of you guys?" Sting asked the group. Normal people weren't usually at the Fairy Tail guild at three thirty in the morning, besides them of course.

"It's Mest, keep Wendy away from him so that she doesn't do anything sixteen year olds definitely aren't supposed to do," The poison-dragon announced; nobody expected him to know this much, nobody expected it at all really.

"And so she doesn't ruin Gajeel's unmated eyes" Natsu added in snickering immaturely.

"The fact that this dumbass got mated before all of us is shameful"

"Actually, I'm mated" Cobra spoke up.

"So am I!" Sting announced proudly, and with a shit ton of arrogance.

"And me." Laxus added in.

"I am as well, sorry Gajeel"

"I'm the only fucking one who isn't mated!"

"Just ask Levy already. We all know she likes—"

"What's going on here?" A loud voice boomed as the pair of parallel wooden doors were rammed open. It was Doranbolt, formerly known to the Fairy Tail guild as Mest Gryder. This was indeed going to get interesting.

"Well, you weren't _supposed _to know this, but the dragon slayers have meetings every month so that we don't fight and cause nuclear warfare" Laxus announced.

"Then where is Wendy and that Rogue fellow?" The sea foam green-eyed male asked. He was a decisive man, he knew all the tricks, and yet he somehow managed not to notice that they had a life sentence criminal with them.

"Wendy stop that squirming! This is for your own good! You're going to get us both caught!" Rogue whisper shouted a bit too loudly. Wendy just hissed back and bit his wrist, causing the shadow dragon slayer to wince.

"Are they?..." Mest asked seeming a bit flustered at the thought going through his mind.

"No, dragons only mate once, and Rogue has already mated. He's just trying to shut her up," Natsu announced obliviously. He was definitely something else.

"NATSU! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE! YOU GAVE ME A FUCKING HEART ATTACK WHEN I WOKE UP AND YOU WEREN'T THERE! DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO TO YOU IF THIS HAPPENS AGAIN! I'M GOING TO RIP YOUR BAL—" He silenced her with a kiss, causing the enraged celestial wizard to blush.

"You're lucky I love you" She huffed; she was obviously pissed off, anybody could tell. "We're leaving now,"

"But Luce, Wendy has this pro—"

"I don't care. I'm pissed off and tired. We're leaving," She said dragging the salamander out of the guild and back to her house. Lucy honestly didn't even hear what Natsu said, sure she cared about Wendy, but she was half asleep which did no help whatsoever.

"She's got him whipped" Sting muttered.

"Why is Cobra here!" Mest screamed out, finally noticing that they had the Oracion Seis criminal with them. So yes, basically what was going on was that he was basically being held hostage by the twin dragons, a former Phantom Lord criminal, a former traitor of Fairy Tail, and an escaped criminal.

"Well I am a dragon slayer, poison to be exact. I'd appreciate it if you would treat me like any other escaped criminal" He said very politely, causing Mest to question his own beliefs. Saying Mest was scared shitless was an understatement; his bowels were long gone and he was long dead. He was still in disbelief that hey had managed to tie him up, damn dragon slayers.

"Well, I think I'm gonna go, I'm getting kind of tired, and I need to go find Levy and talk to her"

"More like fuck her senseless!" Sting shouted out chuckling, earning himself a punch in the arm from Rogue, a horrified look from Mest, a few snickers from Laxus and Cobra, and a death glare from Gajeel. Mest felt sympathy for Rogue, having to keep Sting in line must be a handful, since him and Natsu were basically clones.

Mest was very uncomfortable. He'd been tied up for at least a full hour and his wrists and ankles were getting rope burn. _"Poor little Wendy is still stuck in the closet, I have to find a way to get her out before the guild opens, and it's already four in the morning which is definitely a problem" _He thought to himself, trying to find one tactic or another to get himself untied and over to that locked closet.

"Hey Doranbolt, I'm bringing Cobra back to the prison along with Sting and Rogue. I may not be buddy-buddy with them, but that Minerva bitch will beat the living hell out of them, and since us dragon slayers are close to extinction, I'm going to help them out. See ya!" Laxus spoke as he swaggered out of the Fairy Tail guild with three dragon slayers in hand.

Mest sighed; he was tied up onto a chair, alone, inside the Fairy Tail guild, which he had tried to infiltrate as a narc of some sort almost a little over a decade ago. If any member from the guild were to come in he wasn't sure if he would be relieved or rather scared shitless. Wait, was he forgetting something? He felt like he was being, like he was being watched, and he didn't like it one bit.

"Ohh Mest~" He heard a female voice speak in a very singsong way. That's what he was forgetting. Wendy was still here. Fuck.

The blue-haired sky-maiden strutted her way over to the older male; her body language screaming out "sex" and it was making Mest a bit uncomfortable. At the moment, he was really feeling like a pedophile. She was seventeen and he was what, in his early thirties. Yep, he was definitely a pedophile for ya.

The blue-haired woman nuzzled her head into his neck, trailing kisses down it. This was wrong. This was really _really_ wrong. Wendy didn't care though, her brain was basically a puree and all she could think about was Mest… or Doranbolt.

The scar-faced man a bit terrified to say the least. He was tied up to a wooden chair and there was a horny teenager who was trying to get laid, or mated in her sense. Maybe this wasn't going to be that bad, after this happened he could possibly got to jail and befriend Cobra. They could start an army with the rest of the prisoners and escape, excommunicate themselves from whatever affiliation they were apart of and—no, this wasn't happening. Ever.

Just when Mest thought he was screwed and was going to be arrested, the lights turned on, causing Wendy to pay attention to why the lights had turned on.

In the large doorway of the Fairy Tail guild stood Mirajane Strauss and Makarov Dreyar, both extremely appalled. The two stood there for a moment, questioning multiple things in their head. Why were Wendy and Doranbolt at the guild at six in the morning? Why is Doranbolt tied up to a chair? Is our little Wendy into BDSM? So many questions were going through their heads and some were _not _family friendly.

Mest sighed of relief while Wendy stood still behind the chair intensely blushing.

"Do I want to know what's going on here?" The tiny old man asked in utter disbelief. He was used to his guild having some extremely crazy shenanigans and destroying cities, but never something like this, which kind of surprised him.

"No, no you really _don't _want to know." Mest replied quickly, trying to untie his arms and legs. Mirajane politely walked over to him and untied the rope that had been around his limbs for nearly three hours. The rope burn he had at the moment wasn't going away anytime soon.

After about two hours of explaining to Makarov and Mira they had finally convinced the two that they did not do anything that would get them arrested if they did it in a park and that nothing was going on between them, even though something was and they both knew it.

It was now eight in the morning and the guild was crammed with guild members once again, including two of three male dragon-slayers. An angry-faced Lucy was dragging around Natsu and Laxus was sitting at a table with Bickslow, Freed (His personal fanboy), and Evergreen. The iron dragon-slayer, Gajeel, was nowhere to be found, as well as a tiny blue-haired bookworm. Wendy noted that.

The blue-haired sky mage really did want to go back to Fairy Hills and get some sleep, but she just couldn't. So instead she sat at a wooden table with Mest drinking mass amounts of caffeinated coffee. Wendy wasn't as sweet as she used to be, well she was, except when she hadn't gotten sleep in over twenty-four hours, she was in fact and asshole who would yell at the top of her lungs.

"Hey, uh, Wendy, I was, uh, wondering if you wanted to maybe go on a, uh, date with, uh, me" A sixteen year old Romeo stuttered out.

Wendy turned her head to the side, saying she looked bad would be an understatement; Wendy looked like she had gotten hit by a truck and stood right up and walked off. The blunette spoke slowly and softly "If you don't go away, I promise that I will take your eyes out with chopsticks and feed them to Happy in sushi form" Yeah. She was scary.

Needless to say, that day ended on a good note. Wendy didn't have to endure seeing Romeo look sad when she rejected him because she no longer had to reject him since she scared him off accidentally. And she got laid later on that day so that was a bonus. No more suffering and no more _super _awkward gatherings of the dragon-slayers for girl talk.

**AN2: **_**okay, so this took me like a month and a half to write since I ended up forgetting about it multiple times. But now that it's up, do you want a second chapter? Only a second. I have an idea for a second but it definitely won't be as long. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed reading this crack-y fic as much as I did writing it.**_


End file.
